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The 10 Least Recession-Friendly New Products

136966We're in the middle of a recession, have you heard? If you're like most people and you're looking for ways to keep your budget in check, here are 10 items that hit the market recently that you should probably scratch off your shopping list. At least until the economy turns around or you win the lottery or something.

• Chanel Segway (est. $12,000). Yes, it does come with a Chanel handbag as a special bonus, but if you're interested in keeping your transportation costs under control, we suggest you stick to the bus.
• Brioni "Vanquish II" Men's Suit ($43,000). It's made of vicuna, pashmina and Qiviuk, but even Brioni's CEO admits that introducing this suit in 2009 was probably not a good idea: "The timing was not fortunate for us."
• "Golden Age" Macbook Air ($39,750). Because a laptop that is encased in 24k gold isn't enough for some people, the makers of the "Golden Age" Macbook Air added 12,000 Swarovski crystals on top of the gold. It doesn't function any better than a regular Macbook, though, and we're pretty sure you'll feel much worse when you end up leaving it in the backseat of a cab.

• Gary Pons' Plexart Translucent Piano ($50,500). The desire to have a grand piano is understandable. The desire to have one that looks like this? Even in the best of times, there would be no good excuse.
• Giorgio Armani Montenapoleone Pen ($495). Armani's new pen collection bears the designer's "lasered signature," and you can pick from several exciting colors like red, black, and "petrol green." But you can find a pen that works just as well at Staples for $5.99.
• Bugatti Veyron, Bleu Centenaire ($1.7 million). If you really must shame your friends by buying a new sports car while they're all being forced to sell theirs, stick with a run-of-the-mill Ferrari. It'll run you one-tenth the price of this Bugatti.
• Chopard Blue Diamond Ring ($16.26 million). Blue diamonds are some of the rarest in the world. But you'd probably have more success finding find one at the bottom of the ocean than Chopard will have finding interested buyers right now. 
• Vincent Facquet Luxury Billiard Table ($177,000). Is seems like a bit silly to buy a pool table that's way too precious for anyone to play on, no?
• Personalized Cartier Perfume ($75,000). Having a scent designed especially for you may have impressed your friends a year or two ago. These days? You could very well end up with a black eye.
• Yva Vibrator ($1,500). There are cheaper ways to get off during a recession than by buying a $1,500 gold vibrator from Sweden. Believe it.


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Economy Almost Good Enough for Rich to Start Rubbing Our Noses In Their Private Jets Again
Women Earning More, Men Sulking More
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